Feedback From a Loyal Customer

In 1996, we received this fan(?) letter from one of our loyal customers:

I bought some beef jerky at the Cut River General Store the other day.  The Cut River Store is Epoufette’s contribution to the world of commerce.  Their featured products are:  Smoked Fish and Beef Jerky which they produce in their own smokehouse.  Beef jerky, for those of you not familiar with the product, has the appearance and consistency of a distorted section of steel reinforcement bar salvaged from a devastating slaughterhouse fire.  The taste is probably similar too.  Like olives and castor oil, beef jerky is an acquired taste that one either detests or, in the case of the gastronomically impaired, find it appealing.  One day I tried a piece that our hostess had slated for the garbage.  I became hooked on beef jerky.

Beef jerky gets its name from Jerky Adams who was a spastic cook in an early lumbering camp near Epoufette.  The camp meat was so tough that it was necessary to cut it into strips.  Because of Jerky’s affliction, his cleaver would chop slivers of wood from the table during the meat slicing process.  Jerky over-cooked the mixture of wood and meat into bars of solidified black food with a decided wood smoke flavor.  Following the lumberjack revolt that resulted in Jerky’s tar and feathering, the woodsmen made an interesting discovery.  One of the lumberjacks who had eaten Jerky’s beef sticks was never bothered by attacks from bears, wolves, or mosquitoes.  Because of its protective powers, beef jerky (as it became known) blossomed as the food of choice in lumbering camps.

As civilization moved westward, it was noted that these camps remained isolated pockets of wilderness.  Unfortunately, the breath of the consumer of beef jerky causes respiratory distress among humans, or any living thing in the vicinity of a jerky fanatic.  The above probably explains why I’m writing this news-letter alone, sitting on a rock by the lake, many miles downwind from Epoufette.

Hope and Bob

Copyright 1996 Hope & Bob, loyal (?) customers of the Cut River Store

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